Ganesh Murthy: January 2011

Saturday, January 8, 2011

Two Cheetahs murdered

Within two days after elephants died (refer my previous post) a mother cheetah and two cubs have been murdered by poisoning. This incident occurred near Channapatna, Karnataka state, India. The local court has expressed "worry" over the incident. Indians just talk talk and talk. We don't implement anything. Shame on us. Forget the silicon valley, IT boom, all fake stuff. If you can't respect the environment where you live, the country is nothing. Two more elephants died near kabini back water just last week. In India, lot of incidents like this happens but many of them don't get media attention. Media is busy writing the underwear color of bollywood actress and any minority issue (you know which dreaded religion I am talking about)

Friday, January 7, 2011

Pogadiralo Ranga

Thursday, January 6, 2011

Humans are the worst animals on earth

Yes, Humans are the worst animals on earth. Look at the below picture. A mother elephant is crying by seeing his calf dead. The little one died because of crossing electric fence. This incident occurred yesterday (01/05/2011) in Alur (India)

The owner of the land had electrified fence all over his farm. The above picture is taken from a regional newspaper. Read the translation of above text "Either animals or humans should die one day or another. In Hassan district, two elephants died after getting electrocuted. Everybody were touched when the mother elephant cried the whole day. The mother elephant did not move even after firing gun shots in air, fire crackers but stood near the calf whole day and softly touching his calf thinking it will wake up".

The newspaper doesn't even mention that the farmer was irresponsible. A similar incident occurred in West Bengal a few weeks back. A train hit 3 elephants while they were crossing the railway track.

We Indians are irresponsible and always blame each other and point fingers. We deserve more than death. Poor animals.

Wednesday, January 5, 2011

Women are clever

Marriage - Part I

Typical macho man married typical good-looking lady and after the
wedding, he laid down the following rules: "I'll be home when I want, if
I want and at what time I want and I don't expect any hassle from you.
I expect a great dinner to be on table unless I tell you that I won't be
home for dinner. I'll go hunting, fishing, boozing and card-playing
when I want
with my old buddies and don't you give me a hard time about it.
Those
are my rules. Any comments?"

His new bride said, "No, that's fine with me. Just understand that
there will be sex here at seven o'clock every night ......... whether
you're here or not."

(DAMN SHE'S GOOD!)
************************************
Marriage (Part II)
Husband and wife had a bitter quarrel on the day of their 40th wedding
anniversary! The husband yells, "When you die, I'm getting you a
headstone that reads: "Here Lies My Wife - Cold As Ever" "Yeah?" she
replies. "When you die, I'm getting you a headstone that reads:
"Here Lies My Husband Stiff At Last"

(HE ASKED FOR IT!)

******************************
Marriage (Part III):
Husband (a doctor) and his wife are having a fight at the breakfast
table.
Husband gets up in a rage and says, "And you are no good in bed either,"
and storms out of the house.
After sometime, he realizes he was nasty and decides to make amends
and rings her up. She comes to the phone after many rings, and the
irritated husband says, "what took you so long to answer the phone?" She
says, "I was in bed." "In bed this early, doing what?" "Getting a second
opinion!"

(YEP, HE HAD THAT ONE COMING, TOO!)

******************************************

Marriage (Part IV):

A man has six children and is very proud of his achievement. He is so
proud of himself, that he starts calling his wife, "Mother of Six" in
spite of her objections.
One night, they go to a party. The man decides that it's time to
go home and wants to find out if his wife is ready to leave as well. He
shouts at the top of his voice, "Shall we go home 'Mother of Six?'

His wife, irritated by her husband's lack of discretion, shouts right
back, "Anytime you're ready, Father of Four."

(RIGHT ON, LADY!)

**************************************

Marriage (Part V): The Silent Treatment

A man and his wife were having some problems at home and were
giving each other the silent treatment. Suddenly, the man realized that
the next day, he would need his wife to wake him at 5:00 AM for an early
morning business flight. Not wanting to be the first to break the
silence (and LOSE), he wrote on a piece of paper, "Please wake me at
5:00 AM." He left it where he knew she would find it.

The next morning, the man woke up, only to discover it was 9:00 AM and
he had missed his flight. Furious, he was about to go and see why his
wife hadn't wakened him, when he noticed a piece of paper by the bed.
The paper said, "It is 5:00 AM. Wake up."

Men are not equipped for these kinds of contests.

God may have created man before woman, but there is always a rough draft
before the masterpiece.

Unix Commands

$ cat "food in cans"
cat: can't open food in cans

$ nice man woman
No manual entry for woman.

$ rm God
rm: God nonexistent

$ ar t God
ar: God does not exist

$ ar r God
ar: creating God

$ "How would you rate Quayle's incompetence?
Unmatched ".

$ [Where is Jimmy Hoffa?
Missing ].

$ ^How did the sex change operation go?
^ Modifier failed.

$ If I had a ( for every $ the Congress spent, what would I have?
Too many ('s.

$ make love
Make: Don't know how to make love. Stop.

$ sleep with me
bad character

$ got a light?
No match.

$ man: why did you get a divorce?
man:: Too many arguments.

$ !:say, what is saccharine?
Bad substitute.

/* not csh but sh */
$ PATH=3Dpretending!/usr/ucb/which sense
no sense in pretending!

$ drink bottle: cannot open
opener: not found